I take it you may wish to improve yourself
I take it you may wish to improve yourself. I assume you may have a specific interest in maturing your emotional and mental state to ease your human experience, make it somewhat more comfortable, maybe even enjoyable. If that be true, then these words may be of help.
To begin, I must advise you to come to terms with your inevitable demise. You're going to die, as will all who exist, and there's nothing you can do about it but react. How you react is up to you; hence, this being the first step in maturing by taking responsibility for a fundamental matter central to your happening. If you can consciously accept the circumstances of your existence, rather than operate with the gravity of this knowledge unconsciously directing your life, you can proceed to mitigate other areas of difficulty.
Secondly, know yourself to be a biological phenomenon. You're an animal, a concoction of god knows what materialising itself on a foundation of nothingness. You will fault, repeatedly, indefinitely, as you're a constitution of mistakes. Therefore, don't be so stressed to err no matter the criticism received from ignorant minds; it's necessary for growth.
Thirdly, let go a little. Give up this desire for control. Nothing nor no one is in control, and who would want to be? Imagine trying to control chaos - you'd send yourself mad. I know you probably try to for a sense of security, safety, which is understandable. However, too much of it causes anxiety. Relieve this by knowing you're a subject of chaos, darkness - there's nothing to fear as you're born from the depths of it. The psychology of this is crucial. It's important to know you have darkness within you, and the only way to make light of it is to accept its presence. That will help you forgive both yourself and others, as well as strengthen your will.
Fourthly, don't get too caught in the drama. Distance yourself when necessary from situations or people that purposely complicate life, usually through means of language. Language is something I advise philosophising. Learn how powerful it is - how it's the founding layer of your identity and reality, and therefore impacts your experience. Be wise with your social interactions. Surround yourself with individuals who give you the freedom to expand your lexicon and, therefore, your understanding.
Lastly, be real with yourself. Stop trying to fit in by substituting what feels right for you. If it causes no harm to others, then express your truth freely. And be honest with yourself. Confront your bullshit. You know you're full of it as much as I am, but expose it, bring it forth, laugh, learn and feel what it's like to be human.